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#1 I liked it, generally.

#2 I'm not sure the plot makes sense in the middle. I'm not sure that's supposed to matter, so long as it moves along quickly.

#3 Extremis fits into my Avengers science model almost perfectly. How did that happen? That never occurred to me as a possibility. (Yes, I am a pessimist.) But it's so perfect that I'm tempted to use it as a plot point in my story (sometime in the far future), since I need something like that to catalyze all kinds of other stuff that needs to happen.

And if canon gives you a gift, it's ungrateful not to use it.

(On the other hand, writing canon explicitly into a fic is tricky, I've only rarely seen it done well, and assuming everyone knows what happens in canon and therefore leaving out important plot points because they're well known is not aesthetically pleasing in a long fic (IMO). So that will definitely be a challenge. And I'd have to do some work on reducing the implications of Extremis if at that point I don't want to change the world quite that much...but since that's probably toward the end of the first main story arc, it might be okay.)

#4 It occurs to me that if you eliminate Aldrich Killian from the main character roster as completely unnecessary, and stick Maya Hansen in all the places he is, it would tighten up the plot. Never have two characters where one character will do, it generally gives that one character more depth and interest? And really the whole thing with Aldrich Killian and Maya Hansen is sort of a muddle, the only point I can see to having two of them is possible parallelism in a bunch of different directions (Aldrich vs. Maya as teased and titillated by Tony and then abandoned, Aldrich + Pepper vs. Maya + Tony...) but it never quite gels as an interesting commentary on anything that I can see.

I also like the scene in the revised Maya-only version where Maya and Pepper talk about leadership and leadership styles...and there's a lot of potential to the scene where Maya shows up unexpectedly and pretends to be (mostly) innocent while gathering intelligence and spreading disinformation, before getting angry about being called a botanist and...

#5 It's too bad this heartwarming Christmas story was released in May (and I didn't see it until September). There's something about Christmas that seems odd at other times of the year.

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LookingForOctober

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